Sunday, June 11
e walk home along east coast in the dark.
triggered and bot back those abandoned memories.
"if only he was there back wit me."
foolish thinkin.
3 mths have passed.
have smiled, and moved on.
with each new day, i told myself.
dun ever turn back, just stay on the path tt
u haven chosen.
friends have replaced e longin fer HIM to return.
no longer naive.
no longer foolish.
no longer e deceived one.
ironically, i cant seem to let go the past.
i can nv bring myself to.
i have gave up on him.
but not our past.
the familiar path and the calm night.
he was there den.
but no longer now.
walked tt familiar route alone tonight.
with just e company of the stars and loneliness starts to hit in.
i struggled to hold back those tears.
instead,chose to sob sliently deep dwn.
and bottom all the blues i have all to myself.
hurt.
solemn.
amanda's heart clearly is the only "thing" tt can understand
what she is goin thru after all this time.
brief,cold replies have cleared all doubts.
wishful thinkings.
random thoughts.
insane emotions.
certainly have enuf of sickening emotions tt are
literally choking me each time when i am alone.
if given the chance to turn back time.
i rather we nv had started.
fer his departure left a wound in my heart.
no longer friends.
nth but acquaintance.
am just another ordinary contact in his phonebook.
nth special.
*bruised
/12:02 AM
mandy blogged.